3 Proven Steps to Combat Postpartum Depression & Build Emotional Resilience After Childbirth

In this episode, we dive deep into the physiological, mental, and spiritual aspects of postpartum recovery. Join us as we unpack the concept of postnatal depletion, exploring how nutrient loss, hormonal changes, and societal pressures affect a mother's well-being.

Discover practical strategies for replenishing your body, including nutrition tips, the importance of rest, and aligning with biblical principles of stewardship. We also discuss the power of creating a supportive village and breaking free from the isolation so many mothers face today.

Whether you're a new mom, a seasoned mother, or supporting someone in their postpartum journey, this episode offers actionable insights and encouragement to help you thrive during the infinite chapters of motherhood.

Plus, learn about our upcoming workshop designed to equip you with the tools to combat postpartum challenges holistically—physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

Tune in and reclaim the wellness you deserve!

Join us in the Eternal Postpartum Movement where we seek to radically re-define postpartum, supporting providers and mothers in reclaiming wellness and collectivism through the infinite chapters of postpartum. We invite you to join the movement and make a lasting impact on mothers in need. Every contribution, big or small, helps us bring freedom, restoration, and support to women on their postpartum journey.

✨ Download our free Postpartum Planning Guide and start preparing for your unique journey with confidence.
✨ Register for "Reimagining Motherhood: The Complete Pathway to Combatting Postpartum Depression After Childbirth"—an empowering workshop designed to equip you holistically for the challenges of motherhood.
✨ Book a Maternal Care Catalyst Call and discover personalized support tailored to your needs.
✨ Get involved with The Well: Motherhood & Postpartum Renewal Retreat, opening in St. Louis in 2025—a serene sanctuary for moms to renew their minds, bodies, and spirits.
Visit our website for links and details, and let’s continue to walk this path of wellness and restoration together! 🌟

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Transcript

 Hey, I'm Kilah and for over nine years, I struggled with mental illness and feeling so depleted. It was all triggered by my motherhood journey. And I realized quickly that so many moms are just like I was. I finally reclaimed my health holistically, according to biblical principles. And I want to teach you how to do the same, whether you're newly postpartum or a few years in this podcast is for you, it's time for us to radically redefine postpartum so that you can show up to be the mom that Yahweh has created you to be. This is the eternal postpartum podcast. Let's learn and heal together. 

  📍  📍  📍  Hey everyone. Welcome back to another episode of the eternal post-partum podcast. I'm your host, Kilah. I'm the owner and founder of Elephant Baby and the leader of The Elephant Baby Foundation and together we are spearheading a radical movement in which we help providers and mothers reclaim wellness and collectivism throughout the infinite chapters of postpartum according to biblical principles. I want to start today's episode with the question. 

If you haven't gotten a chance to grab yourself a warm nourishing beverage and to settle in, I would definitely encourage you to do that.  Just go ahead and pause the podcast for a second get your drink. Um, but yeah, I want to start with the question. Question today. Did you know that there are specific steps that you can implement. In order to combat postpartum depression after childbirth. Um, could I be so bold to even pose the question of, did you know that there are steps that you can take to prevent postpartum depression in your perinatal journey? Um, I am very, very cautious of using that word prevent because I know what society teaches when it comes to mental illness and the fact of the matter is that our current healthcare system disempowers us in making choices that allow us to prevent and combat mental health issues. Our current healthcare system takes a very linear approach when it comes to healthcare in general. But I noticed this even more. So when it comes to mental health and mental health, health issues. In this podcast episode, I'll share with you three essential steps that you should take  to help you, not only combat common postpartum challenges. But also to help you build emotional resilience throughout the infinite chapters of postpartum.

If you were experiencing postpartum depression, I just want to acknowledge that I have been in your shoes. I know exactly where you are. 

Um, as stated in my intro, in the podcast, I wrestled with depression for over nine years before coming to deep restorative healing. And I remember throughout my motherhood journey, when I really hit a point where I wanted things to change so deeply. Because I was experiencing a lot of, um, suicidal ideations, a lot of depletion. 

I was completely overwhelmed and I felt very hopeless in my motherhood journey, and I hit a place. It was almost like a recognition of.  Um, Just acknowledging that there was something that I had to do in order to change, but I was so terrified at the thought of taking any sort of pharmaceutical drug. My background is in psychology. 

I've earned a bachelor's degree in psychology, and I learned a lot about mental health and I learned a lot about, uh, prescriptions. Uh, specifically antidepressants anti-anxiety drugs. And I knew the side effects, like I knew, um, potentially what could happen with my body if I decided to go ahead and take the script. And some of those side effects and symptoms that we don't even talk about are the fact that a lot of women do experience suicidal thoughts and,  a lot of women when they begin taking those synthetic drugs they become a lot worse off than when they first began. Um, another thing I studied  is just the effects of trying to come off the drug 

once you started the drug. So. For me, it was almost like I hit a brick road because I knew that I needed to change, but I didn't understand exactly what steps could help me do that outside of, you know, the things that we kind of normalize in our society, which I wouldn't necessarily say are terrible things such as you know, therapy, um, there is some recognition of depending on how severe your depression is, of how things like exercise, you know, those things can help along when you are experiencing depression. But the huge problem I see is that we do not take a holistic approach when it comes to addressing mental health issues. That is understanding that there is not one linear solution, typically that can be applied in order to help overcome, prevent and combat mental issues such as postpartum depression.  So there always seems to be some, you know, we're given like pieces to the puzzle, but we're not giving the whole picture. And so it's really important that we begin to discuss this. 

And again, I've been through this, I want to walk you through, um, you know, just the years of study and the research and the experience that I have in overcoming, holistically. Through this episode with hopes to encourage you In your own perinatal journey so that you can be hopeful in knowing that you can thrive, not only in those immediate months postpartum, but throughout the infinite postpartumchapters. So in owning a postpartum care agency here in the St. Louis Metro area, I've had the opportunity to help dozens of women in preparing for their postpartum journeys. And a lot of times we're speaking during pregnancy and I'm learning and hearing from them to understand, you know, what are their biggest fears coming into their postpartum time or where do they feel like they need to be most empowered? That's a question that I love to ask when I'm having my connection sessions with our clients. 

And one of the biggest things that I hear is this fear that mothers have, that they are going to experience depression and anxiety. And oftentimes this comes when a mom has had a child before they have multiple children. Maybe they experienced depression, anxiety, or some other perinatal mood and anxiety disorder. You know, in previous times, and they're fearful that it's going to happen again. And I think that the most disappointing thing is this acceptance that we've come to as mothers. 

That there's nothing that we can do in order to prevent or combat it. Um, so obviously they're reaching out to our agency because they want to line up as much support as they can in their postpartum journey to help combat um, you know, some of those issues and those struggles that they dealt with prior, which is a really great thing. 

And that's something that I'll touch on later in podcast episode, because I do believe that it's so important that we set up support around us in order to thrive. But there are also ways that we can truly become empowered  in knowing what steps to take in order to combat and prevent depression. And I, I think that's the biggest thing that I want to debunk. Our society makes us believe that, Hey, that there's nothing that we can do. 

You know, we've heard that mental health issues run in the family. And, um, you know, there's, there's really nothing that we can do in order to help ourselves along. And that's simply not true. While it is true that, you know, we have genetic dispositions to certain ailments and issues. 

We have to understand a little bit more fully what makes us more susceptible to those genetic dispositions. There is this newer field of study called epigenetics and Epigenetics is a science of how environmental influences change our expression of genes. Contrary to popular belief, the genes inherited from one's parent does not set the future of a person's development in stone. And I love this. I think acknowledging this truly begins to align us with the thought and the understanding that our bodies were created in a specific way. 

And I love speaking about how, if we are intentional about the way that our body was designed as women, we're intentional about acknowledging that our Eternal Creator Yahweh was very intentional and very uh, specific in the intricate design of our bodies when we pay attention to that and began to acknowledge and implement protocols, according to the design of our bodies, then that's when we can really be empowered to create habits of lifelong. Lifelong wellness. 

And so this leads into the very first step that I believe that every woman, every mother must take when it comes to preventing and combating postpartum depression. After childbirth. And step one, really centers around understanding the postpartum body. In order to steward our health in order to steward our bodies, we have to first understand all of the physiological changes that happen. 

Um, during the postpartum time. I remember after I had my first child. Y'all I was up running miles weeks after I had had my baby. I remember that my husband and I started having sex before we got the six week okay. Um, I mean, I did try to pay attention to the things that I was eating. 

I remember eating a lot of smoothies. Um, I'm sorry, drinking a lot of smoothies, eating a lot of salads. Unfortunately, all of these things set me up to experience depression. And depletion in my motherhood journey. And the thing about it is I had five children, very close together. And,  with the more children that you have, the more susceptible that you become to things like depression, anxiety, depletion, especially if you're not taking time to replenish your body during your postpartum time. And that replenishment and nourishment should be happening in various ways. 

So I always love explaining and just giving a picture of what postnatal depletion is so that you guys can understand. So just imagine this bag full of water. Uh, the water in your bag represents the life, the vitality, the energy that you feel as a mother. And, uh, you know, so, so many of us often just crave and desire  to getting back to how we were before we started having kids. 

And there's a reason for that. But imagine that you have this bag full of water. So every, every sleepless night.  Every struggle with your breastfeeding journey. every stressor that you experience at work or at home, these things begin to prick little holes in our bag. And the thing about it is we have to recognize and realize that the very moment that our babies enter earth side, when you are laboring, it's called labor for a reason. 

Okay. When you were going through labor, when you are delivering your baby, your body is stripped of vital nutrients that absolutely must be replenished. If you were going to combat depression, anxiety depletion, those common issues that we have normalized in our society. So every stressor, every sleepless night, Every time that your, uh, your nipples are cracked. Y'all know 

that's the worst feeling to have cracked nipples or engorgement, or, you know, all of these things are pricking holes into our bag.  And in other case. You know, prior to motherhood, we might, if we have a sleepless night, we might be able to easily replenish and have a good night of sleep, you know, the next day. 

But when it comes to motherhood and when it comes to postpartum specifically, unfortunately there's so many holes pricking within our bag. And that water is draining up before we, um, have the opportunity to fill our bags with water again. And so this is essentially the picture of postnatal depletion. 

This is what a lot of mothers experience, without even realizing that they're experiencing it. Again, if you have multiple children or you've gone through multiple pregnancies and you're not taking the time or you're not coming to that deep restorative replenishment and healing, then you're, you know, it's just like you're pouring. Your water's getting poured out your water, getting poured out and. Eventually we're sucked dry, and that's literally how so many of us feel. 

 It's essentially why postpartum depression is actually a symptom of postnatal depletion. And so again, we must understand what's going on physiologically with our bodies. We must understand that our bodies are being stripped of vital nutrients. We must understand that there are changes happening with our organ systems. 

There are changes that are happening with our digestive system. And that we must imple implement protocols that are going to support the changes that are happening within our body. It's not the best time to be eating a bunch of raw foods because when we're eating raw foods, it can create, um, even more damage to our gastrointestinal tract, making it harder for us to absorb the nutrients that we need. Um, it's why a lot of mothers experience gas, bloating, constipation, and then, uh, eventually down the line, you know, Uh, it's, it shows up as an auto-immune issue and it all goes back to that gut health. Um, a lot of issues that we experience when it comes to not only our physical health. But also our mental health go back directly. You know, it's, it's that gut brain connection. And so we must be empowered to, to understand. This is how our eternal creator designed our bodies. 

If we lean into how he designed our bodies. And if we learn and if we know, I mean, a lot of this information has just been stripped from us over time, and that's why it's so important for us to reclaim um, this information so that we can thrive in our motherhood journeys. So the first step is truly understanding what is going on with the postpartum body. When I started learning how the postpartum body actually worked. It changed everything for me, it was like seeing our creator's design in action. 

It was an understanding of, oh, this is what's going on with my hormones. And these are the steps that I need to take in order to get this hormone level back elevated. Or this is what protocols that I need to initiate in order to level this hormone out.  We deserve to know the basics about what's happening with our hormones specifically during the postpartum time. So that we can thrive. The second step that you should take when it comes to preventing and combating postpartum depression after childbirth. Is actually implementing what you've learned and taking those steps to properly steward your body so that's, you can deeply heal and replenish. 

The principle of stewardship is really close to my heart because when I was in the depths of, um, some of the deepest bouts of depression that I experienced as a mom,  I can remember praying and just asking God to take away everything that I was going through.  I didn't understand why He wouldn't heal me and why He just wouldn't help me to become better.  Especially because my desire was to just show up better all around. 

 I knew that my health issues were impacting my household. Uh, specifically my children, um, and just the dynamic of my home all around. I knew that my mental health issues were crippling me from stepping into alignment into the calling it the Most High had on my life. And so this principle of stewardship, wasn't something that I truly understood until I actually began to take the steps to heal. And I want to explain a little bit more. Why it's so important for us.  Um, If we're going to create habits of lifelong wellness, it's important for us to know how to steward our bodies. I look back now and I understand that if Yah to heal me and pull me out of the depression that I was experiencing when I was begging and cleaning for him to do that, I wouldn't have taken the time to learn the principles of stewardship that are truly necessary in order for us to thrive. Um, the scriptures talk about our bodies being a temple for a reason. 

And I think  if I would've healed, I would've just continued the same practices. I would've continued eating the same. I would have continued the same way of life without learning the vital lesson of the importance of stewardship when we care for bodies as temples than it is a true act of worship onto the Most High God. The scriptures also say that. You know, whatever that we do. 

If we're eating, if we're drinking, we should do all to the glory of the Most High God and this is the lesson that I'm still learning because I struggle sometimes when it comes to eating. Um, sometimes I'm a very emotional eater and I will grab the junk because it helps me feel better. I mean, I'm just being honest. 

Do I have permission to be transparent in this space today? I hope so, because I want to encourage you guys to do the same, but understanding how everything that I do. I am presenting myself as a living sacrifice for the God that I serve. And, um, there's just so much beauty and not only recognizing that stewardship is important, but that we are blessed on a very practical level

when we do practice stewardship over our bodies. So for a lot of mothers, this means the opportunity to experience a lot of the practical blessings that come when we walk in obedience to the ways of the most high God. And when we walk in obedience to his word, The scriptures actually talk a ton about the way that we should eat and the way that we should steward our bodies. 

And not only do the scriptures address, nutritional protocols,  but the scriptures also address the need for rest. And this is very huge when it comes to postpartum, when it comes to postpartum healing. When we rest and when we honor the Sabbath and when we practice and have a mindset of truly resting our bodies according to the way that God wants us to rest. 

Then again, we reap a lot of those practical benefits and we reap a lot of spiritual blessings for walking in obedience.

We live in a culture and a society that tells us that, you know, the person who snaps back the person who adheres to the hustle culture. The mom that can do it all. We live in a culture that praises those things. So culture is telling us, go, go, go. 

Culture is telling us snapback. Culture is telling us that, Hey, we don't deserve to rest. All while God commanded this principle of rest in this principle of remembering the Sabbath for his people. And again, I believe that there are a lot of physical benefits that we reap when we walk in obedience, as well as spiritual benefits when we understand the postpartum body

and we understand all of the hormones that are shifting. Then we know that rest is vital in order to bring those hormones back into and to balance. And I teach multiple aspects of rest, not just sleeping. I don't believe that rest is just sleep. I believe that we can implement protocols of rest into our daily lives, especially in the immediate postpartum time, in order to combat postpartum depression and truly a build and emotional resistance throughout the infinite chapters of postpartum. Our bodies were designed to heal intentionally.  When we implement these protocols, it shows us the connection between physical care and emotional  resilience.  If you are wanting to know and understand again Exactly what's going on with your hormones. 

If you want to feel empowered in knowing how to replenish your hormones in very specific ways. If you want guidance on what nutritional protocols that you should implement if you want those. Again, if you want crystal clear guidance on the nutritional practices that you should implement and begin to implement, even before the baby comes. So that you're kind of, you know, gaining that habit. 

I would love to invite you to this workshop that I am hosting here in- person I'm January 19th, 2025. Now, if you're listening to this past January 19th, 2025. Then by now, we've got the workshop online and accessible to all. And so if you want to join me, I am going to be hosting a workshop and which I am going into the depth of these topics and explaining the physiological changes and helping you to understand, uh, your postpartum body, all those changes that are happening. 

We're going to go through diet and nutrition and exactly what foods you should embrace, what foods you should enjoy. I'm going to put together meal plans that you can follow shopping lists and all those practical resources you'll have access to all of that. And we'll also go through restorative practices that you should implement. Um, again, if you can do it before your postpartum time, all the better. But this workshop is truly,  a one of a kind workshop that addresses how to combat postpartum issues by acknowledging the physical, the mental, the spiritual, and the emotional so that you can thrive in your postpartum journey. 

So I would love to invite you to join me in the workshop. Again, if you're local, we're going to meet in person and I'm going to drop the link to the details for that. I'll also drop a link to the waiting list. For the online workshop, for those of us who are not able to join in person. Um, but I would love to invite you.  All right. 

And the last step that you should take and implement in order to combat and prevent postpartum depression in your postpartum time. I mentioned it at the very beginning of the podcast and it is truly setting up a supportive network and community around you. I believe that we were not meant to walk this journey alone. 

We were never meant to be alone. Um, the Bible speaks of that in Genesis. In Genesis, it says man was not meant to be alone. And so the most high guy creates the help for a man so that he can have a companion throughout life. And I believe that when we read the scriptures that we see the importance and the beauty of collectivism. Um, unfortunately we live in a society that is very individualistic and while individualism can have its benefits.  I believe that, you know, having a village around us is what truly allows us to thrive in our Motherhood journeys. 

 I remember feeling very frustrated. That I was the solution to the problem that I was facing, that I had to be the one to take the steps to, you know, to heal my body, that I had to be the one to create the support system around me. 

I remember feeling very resentful over the fact that this is not beautifully integrated into our society. If you look at other societies, other societies have systems of support that are beautifully woven into their culture, especially around the postpartum time. Either mom goes and lives with family members or family members come to live with mom so that she can ultimately focus on healing, resting bonding with her baby. 

And I remember feeling resentful in the fact that here in America, That's just not the case. Like why do I have to be the one to bring all the solutions to the problems we're facing when I am the one who's impacted by that. I know I am the one being impacted by the neglect for postpartum. And now I have to be the one to fix it. Um, but just remain encouraged in the fact when we begin to create the village for each other and when we begin to create support systems, Um, around us that is truly when we can begin to thrive as mothers.  I know how difficult it can be to ask for help. I know the feelings that we get of not wanting to inconvenience others, or maybe you don't ask for help because maybe you have in the past and whoever you asked didn't show up. And we've built like this wall around us. That makes it very difficult for us to ask for help. 

And can I just gently maybe challenge you in the thought that we have to let our pride go and just begin to vocalize the things that we need. Um, the support that we need. We have to begin to think of people outside of, you know, you may have your expectations of family supporting you or friends supporting you. 

And again, when they don't show up, you feel disappointed. So it makes it hard for you to ask others. When I really started to understand that I have to be very mindful and intentional about asking for help. I began to think of people in my church community. 

I began to think of, you know, just people that I would never think of just to ask. And I had to challenge myself. And I took baby steps and I would give myself like weekly challenges of I'm going to ask so-and-so to help me with laundry today. Or I'm going to ask so-and-so to help me with doing the girl's hair today, you know? You know, coming up with those practical challenges and things that would actually be helpful to you in your motherhood journey and inviting others to minister to you in that way. You never know who might just be looking for an opportunity to support you, but they don't want to overstep or make you feel bad by offering the support. 

Um, and so when we, when we keep our mouth closed and don't share what our needs are, it not only does a disservice to us as mothers, but it also also does it as service to others who want to bless us and who want to minister throughout our motherhood journeys. And so again, that collectivism, that community building support system around you being intentional about having a plan for what that support is going to look like in your postpartum time. It's very, very crucial.  I've actually put up on our website at post-partum planning guide, that would probably be very beneficial to you. 

If you are pregnant and you are planning for your postpartum time. A lot of times we talk about the birth plan, but then postpartum goes neglected and it's honestly one of the most sacred, impactful and influential times of our perinatal journey. So if I can't remember exactly where that guide is, I might post a link in the description so that you can have access to that guide. It's going to help you think of the questions that you're not asking when it comes to your postpartum support and really build out a practical plan for what your support is going to look up. 

Look like. But yeah, again, that collectivism coming together as a village is it's crucial. This is exactly what the eternal postpartum movement is about. 

We focused on three main pillars in order to radically redefine what postpartum is in our society. Uh, the first pillar centers around holistic empowerment and teaching mothers how to be in the driver's seat of their health so that they can create lifelong habits of wellness, according to biblical principles. The second pillar centers around collective action. 

Um, being that support in that village through one  another and teaching mothers, how to create that village, you know, for themselves. The last pillar really centers around being a catalyst for change. And this is really where we focus our efforts on supporting those who support mothers. And allowing them to elevate their expertise and feel confident in the things that they're teaching. So that they can be set apart and they can be recognized as an expert in their field. This also centers around helping providers to create systems in their business so that they can be profitable. 

 If you guys are like me, maybe you're a provider listening in and we struggle often with this desire and this burning passion just to see a change in our culture and our society regarding postpartum. And sometimes we struggle with the profitability aspect of that and creating financial success and. The maternal care catalyst pillar really, empowers providers to be again, not water themselves down walk authentically and who the most high God has called them to be and who they're called to serve. And then creating marketing and systems in their business to attract those who, that they are called to serve. I believe that this is important because when we, as providers are profitable, it allows us to give back more. 

We can open our hands freely to those who are in need. And we can truly begin to change the system and redefine postpartum here in our society. So maybe you're a provider listening to this podcast episode. And you want to feel more confident in teaching your clients, how to combat and prevent, depression, anxiety, or other perinatal mood and anxiety disorders. 

You want to feel more confident in teaching them how to do that holistically, whether they are newly postpartum or whether they're, you know, a little further along in their journey. I want to invite you to book a call with me. Again, a huge part of the eternal postpartum movement is training and equipping providers in advanced holistic postpartum support. 

So that we can create the change that we want to be. If you're ready to begin to expand your reach and grow and scale your postpartum practice. Then we absolutely need to book a call or maybe you don't have an established practice and you're looking to get into the field as a postpartum doula. 

I would love for you to book a call with me as well. The maternal care catalyst call is all about me learning what impact you want to make in your community. And then walking alongside you in order to fulfill that. So click the link in the description box to book your maternal care catalysts call with me. Again, if you are a mother who is looking  for those practical steps, that crystal clear guidance on combating, postpartum, depression, anxiety, and other perinatal mood disorders in your upcoming postpartum time. Then I would love to invite you to the upcoming workshop. 

You can click the link below to learn more. And so all of our supporters out there, many of you guys know of this beautiful initiative that we're bringing to the St. Louis community. We are bringing    📍 The Well: Motherhood & Postpartum Renewal Retreat to our St. 

Louis community. This is a brick and mortar postpartum replenishment center that is reflective of everything that we are doing here at elephant baby and all that we are doing through the eternal postpartum movement. If you're watching on YouTube, you can see the beautiful sketch that I've provided for you all to see the vision that we have for this amazing community. This community will feature your retreat suites, our main building in which we will host workshops, coworking spaces for our providers that we collaborate with, um, tiny homes. Uh, community garden  and so many amazing things to minister, to moms in our communities so that they can thrive throughout the infinite chapters of postpartum. So if you're listening to the podcast and you want to head over to the YouTube channel to check out the sketch, feel free to do that.   We believe that all mothers should have easy access to postpartum care and support no matter where they are in their postpartum journey.  

 📍  📍 So right now we are at the very beginning of our capital campaign. So I want to invite you to learn more about what we are doing at the well, and if it feels aligned, I want to invite you to go ahead and donate. So I will post a link again in the description for you to learn more and to be able to donate so that we can bring The Well  to our community and continue to change the lives of mothers in such an impactful way.   📍 Thank you guys so much for tuning in and I'll see you in the next episode.